Nicole
On page 205, the author wrote, "It was then that I began to see at least some wisdom in the Japanese belief that married women, for all their secondary status, are ultimately more free than men." She wrote this after acknowledging that Mariko was in charge of her life, unlike Takeshi who lived his life in an unhappy job. How would Mariko react if she was told this?
Stephanie B.
"Marriage is not something to work at or worry about. Marriage is for children, for security, for settling into a proper niche in society. By and large it is not for romance or even much emotional intimacy."(p217) Does this quote say that if there are issues in a marriage, its not normal and is looked down upon by society?
Kayo
Are Japanese housewives really happy with their roles if they are so captivated with Rika, the character from Tokyo Love Story, who is very westernized? Or does this fascination simply reflect their interest in someone exotic and nothing deeper? Japan is known to be a modern society with culture. Will Japan still be able to maintain this reputation if they were to allow Japanese women to become as independent as Western women?
Matt
On page 140, Bumiller writes "I was no longer a social observer but was a participant of her life. I knew from the start that my presence would change her life in subtle ways, but this detour seemed harmless, and I thought we would both learn from it". Is it good for Bumiller to have become this active in Mariko's life? Does this affect the usefulness of her information in analyzing Japan as a whole?
Zach F.
What kind of revelations does Markio's depiction of her sex life have on Japanese marriage? What are divorice rates like? What assumptions can we make about divorice just from this reading?
Hannah
Ken-chan explains a "remote" relationship with his father, what does this say about the japanese culture? Is this a similar relationship of american fathers and children?
Alix
Bumiller claims that Mariko views Takeshi's affair as "the normal behavior of a Japanese husband" (215). Why, as Bumiller suggests, do more Japanese women than American women overlook their husband’s cheating? Does a division of gender roles increase the likelihood of sexual infidelity in Japanese relationships?
Shannon
Did the revelation of Takeshi's affair make you feel more compassion towards Mariko or less? Does the fact that she accepted the affair put her at blame for perpetuating the lifestyle of Japanese wives? Should we feel bad for Mariko or should we be blaming her just as much as Takeshi for not fighting back?
Megan G.
What do you believe Bumiller was trying to communicate to the reader when she describes her conversation with Takeshi concerning his perspective about his marriage with Marika? Do you believe she was trying to show a larger trend in respect to marriage in Japanese society?
Kristen
What changes in values in contemporary Japanese society can you observe from chapters 4 to 9?
Stephanie W.
The war story "The Pitiful Elephants" paints a brutal picture of WWII and inaccurately depicting Japan as innocent and peace-loving. However, is this method of teaching really that different from the way American students learn about, for example, Christopher Columbus' "discovery" of America?
Nicole
On page 205, the author wrote, "It was then that I began to see at least some wisdom in the Japanese belief that married women, for all their secondary status, are ultimately more free than men." She wrote this after acknowledging that Mariko was in charge of her life, unlike Takeshi who lived his life in an unhappy job. How would Mariko react if she was told this?
LB
"Which do you prefer-Papa or Mama?" is the analogy Takeshi makes when asked which was more important, his company or his family? Is this truly a common sentiment amongst Japanese businessmen? Is Bumiller's non-reaction surprising at all?
Katy
Mariko loved to watch Tokyo Love and was especially interested in the main character, Rika. She compares herself to Rika saying "I am not a Japanese man's woman... Most Japanese women do what their husbands say." Is this accurate or do you feel that most Japanese women would look at themselves this way?
Bijal
Did anyone find what Tankeshi says at the bottom of page 203 and the top of page 204, about his family and the company, surprising? Wouldn't you think men would pick their company due to the fact that they spend so much time there?
Minoru
I was brought up by not 86 % Buddhism or Shintonism but 1% Christian family. I was trained to play not Japanese traditional musical instruments but the violin. My high school is not usual exam-oriented school but musical school. My way of thinking may be not group-oriented but individualism.
I have been feeling different in the country. Japan looks like one of the foreign countries for me. Where is my identity in the Far East country for "westernized" Japanese?
But one thing I can say with certainty is, I think, it was better for Bumiller not to choose my family as host family.